ED Portmanteau


Inspired by this NY Times On Language article, I present some medical portmanteau:

  • Labnormalities: Dear lord, LFTs are all messed up; this guy’s got a lot of labnormalities, but it looks like it’s all from his chronic alcoholism.
  • High-NR: I have no idea who thought it’d be a good idea to put this alcholic GI bleeder on coumadin, but judging by all that melena, he’s definitely going to have a High-NR.
  • Awheezile: Yeah, she was both inspiratory and expiratory when she came in, but after nebs and steroids she’s totally awheezile and asking to leave.
  • Pelvicize: The ultrasound’s normal, but I guess I should still pelvicize her to make sure her os is closed.
  • Milk of Amnesia: Let’s secure the tube and start the milk of amnesia drip, please.
  • Sprintubate: We’d better sprintubate: that neck hematoma’s not getting any smaller. (Okay, fine, I’ve never used this one.)

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