*with props to BNL

7 Days and 7 Nights

It’s been one week with my new ID;

the kind that says “OK, you can now sue me”

One week since I got the key

to a sleep room that I will probably never see

Four days since my last day off

How long is it that you’ve had that cough?

Yesterday since you had no pee?

And your primary said you had to come to see me.

My first patient was a hoodwink

the kind that made me stop, think

is he real or is this just a scam?

He’s allergic to all meds

Really gives me the dreads

Want to just say no

He wants narcotics, “Yes, please, thank you Ma’am.”

Run to do triage when the door chimes

It’s all about times

Because people want value

Now watch them start to throw fits

You try to match wits

So that JACHO doesn’t bust you

Need to take a break, I start to shake

and I feel a slight headache

I need to eat, but the board is getting busy.

Gotta see the injured toe

make me some dough

my med school debt it will still grow

though it’s been so long now

I think my head is getting dizzy

How can I help you if you won’t tell me what is going on?

I know you’re two but your parent is just too far gone.

Tell me you’d have the pain now for a whole year

Today it hasn’t changed, so?

Well, now I’m here.

I have to see the kid pulling on their ear,

And take a history on “found down drunk”

It’s been one week with my new ID

My new white coat is already grubby

One week, now where’s that knee?

Another pelvic?  no way, seriously…

Three nights till my next day off

Drop your drawers, now turn your head and cough

Yesterday having pain in your belly?

And your primary said you had to come to see me.

And your primary said you had to come to see me.

We’re open 24 hours, so you come and see me.